We celebrated my husband’s 50th birthday this past Saturday. :beer:I think half of my town had a hangover Sunday. What a bash. For those of you who were there and don’t remember? It’s all on video, and video doesn’t lie. Like Lisa getting freaked then sandwiched by Frankie and Nick, and my mil getting sandwiched by her oldest grandson (that would be my son Jeff) and Frankie. My youngest son Will and his two sisters freaking on the dance floor. And Will? Sweetheart…where did you learn to dance like that? And sing too? It was wonderful to watch my husband ballroom dance with our daughter, Rhianna, so reminiscent of Pappy dancing with her less then a year ago. I managed a couple of dances with hubby Astair. I danced with my fil, my sons, their friends, our friends. We ate good food, drank good wine, kept the bartender hopping all night and the DJ spinning. But the best part in retrospect was what people said to me that night. Not just one or two, but many over the course of the evening. They marveled at my beautiful family. And while my kids and in laws are good looking, they meant beautiful in spirit. The smiles were face splitting, the laughter genuine. The hugs and kisses real. We held nothing back and partied like there was no tomorrow. Jeff came home for the event. He has grown up so much in the six weeks he’s been gone. He has the same infectious laugh as his father. My mil looked beautiful, and is so cute after two martinis, my fil, a gem of a man, well, I caught him a few times looking over the room with a prideful glow in his eyes. I’m forever grateful to them for creating my husband.
Yesterday as the toxic fumes cleared from my body, and I popped several more aspirin, I thought about the night and the comments. As a family we have taken some direct hits over the years, and even though my husband received some very bad news this past Friday and it took him down, he bounced back Saturday night. I’ve never seen the man so happy to be surrounded by the people he loves and calls friends.
I think a person’s character is measured by how they respond to adversity. How they respond to loss. Do they cave? or do they go through the cycle of loss and literally pull themselves up by the bootstraps even when it’s the last thing they want to do? But do it because not to means you quit, and for many, when you quit depression sets in, depression leads to a nonproductive existence, and it pulls those around you down. As hard as it is sometimes, one must dig down deep and ‘just do it.’
Because if you don’t live, then all you do is exist. It can all be over so quick.
I learned last week my brother and sister in law were in a horrific accident. Some asshole going too fast in the snow, T boned them. Had my bro and Mare not been wearing seat belts I’d be back east burying them both. Thank God they are safe. Life can be over in a snap, so you must savor it.
Today as we were out for our daily walk we met up with my in laws. We chatted about the party, and laughed recanting the evening. As we rounded a corner a white truck approached and we recognized one of my son’s friends whose parents were in attendance Saturday night. The kid smiles and says, “My dad passed out on the front porch Saturday night!” We laughed. Not that getting snookered drunk and passing out on your front porch is funny, but what was funny was watching this guy and hubby hang out at the bar the night before acting like kids, and having a great time as friends. Lol, it seems they both ended the evening the same way, just in different places.
So as Mom, Dad, Gary and I continued our walk and chatting we decided we were hungry. We came back to our house and cooked a huge brunch (hey, we did just walk for over an hour) and watched the birthday party video. As we laughed and visited it occurred to me again how lucky I am.
I looked at the grin on my father-in-laws face, my mother-in-laws beaming smile, and my husband’s happy face, and with the knowledge that my kids are happy, healthy, and safe, my family back East intact, I realized I have it all. Life is good.
Now, how does all of this relate to writing?
Savor what we take for granted. Keep close those around us who do support, those who encourage instead of discourage, those who are ready to offer positive advice, and steer us in the right direction. Steer clear of negative people. They will only bring you down with them.
And, remember to smile.
Oh, ps, I’m going to figure out how to post the cover. It’s so hot!!!